Stop Teaching! Let the children learn!

Let Children Learn

I keep thinking about questions I used ask my parents when I was a child. The questions like:

Why should I go to school?
Why should I study?
Why should I go to college?

The typical answers that I get are :

To get a good job.
To settle down in Life.
To earn money.

I took these answers and moved on. I didn't really question and argue much on these answers.
But now I am a father and these questions have come back in my conscious. What will I answer when my son ask me the same questions? Will I bark on the same answers handed down by generations or should I take re look at the questions and find the actual answers?

So, Why should I send my son to school?

I don't think it is to get admission in a better college and in turn get a better job and eventually earn good money. In the ideal situation it should be to learn, experience and gain knowledge.
It should be to expose my son to various situations so that he experience and learn from the. It should be expose him to various new aspects and concepts of life and world (like animals, birds, trees, geometry, physics , so that he can absorb them in him and use them as and when required.
With this the next question rises.

Are children learning at school or are they being stuffed?

In current scenario the schools are under pressure and competition to show results and the results are measured in the percentage of students who pass the exams. So now the focus of the teachers is to make the children pass the exams and they do every thing they can to achieve. In this era of competition and expectations from parents the schools (and even parents) have misunderstood the meaning of education.

We think that more our children remember the words and information in their textbooks the more knowledgeable they are. The race is now to make sure our kids remember all the stuff that is out in the textbooks. If a child can reproduce what ever is mentioned in the text books or other books more accurately he/she is considered to be more knowledgeable. The more accurately he reproduces the nearer he gets to being labelled a genius.

So now every kid tries his/her level best to reproduce the books that they read or are told to read.

So, does textbooks determine what our children become?

We all know what we think is what we become.
If our children keep reading and reproducing the books, what they will eventually become are copying machines. The ones who are good at it are heroes of the school and ones who are not, well they are ignored.

Now these copying machines are our future. They determine the path that humanity will take and the future humans will follow.

I am really scared and then how come we have survived this culture so far. How come the situation has not become miserable so far. I believe it is because a lot of great people have chosen not to go to schools. If we just look closely  most of the people who have changed history (for good or bad) are the ones who have escaped the photo copying culture of our schools and colleges. They have been dropouts or just uneducated.

These brave-hearts have done great amount of work for the betterment of humanity in-spite of our schools.

So shall we drop our children from schools?

That would not be practical thing to do. I think we should let our children learn, experience and gain knowledge in-spite of their schools. I think we should not give too much importance to some aspects of the education system like exams, results, rankings and let our children enjoy education in a stress free environment.
We should expose our children to more real life experiences than simulated ones.Let them face the world as it is and learn from it, rather than theorizing about it in their minds. It's better if we just let them deal with various real life situations the way they want to deal with them. Let them formulate their one methods and ways of handling different situations.

I think the only thing we should do is to stop teaching and let our children learn.


JKS


Please read other children related articles at How To Make Children Listen and Children and Competition

Drop the Mask!

A story to think about, told by Osho.

It happened that after the murder of Abraham Lincoln... one hundred years had passed, and the whole year was celebrated in his sacred memory. A drama was prepared, which moved all over America all through the year, playing the same drama based on the life of Abraham Lincoln. And it was a rare coincidence that they could find a man who looked like Abraham – he was lean and thin and tall and ugly. Abraham Lincoln was not a very beautiful person, as far as his face is concerned.

As far as his being is concerned, he was one of the most beautiful persons.

When he was fighting in the election for the presidentship, a little girl suggested to him, ”If you grew a small beard, that would make your face look more beautiful,” because he had marks on his face from small pox. First he laughed, but he thanked the girl and he thought it over. And he grew the beard, and with the beard his face took a totally new shape.

This man had the beard, had the same kind of eyes, the same nose, the same height; so he was given the part of Abraham Lincoln. Abraham Lincoln used to stutter a little once in a while, so he was taught to stutter. He was also a little lame – one leg was a little longer than the other – so they tried to make one of this man’s legs a little longer by traction, pulling it – just a little longer so he started walking like a lame man.

They trained him to speak the way Abraham Lincoln used to speak – one hundred year-old language, words which were in fashion in those days. And he proved to be a perfect actor. Anybody could have misunderstood, seeing him, that he was Abraham Lincoln.

And for one year he was moving around the whole continent playing the same drama, three times a day – in the morning, in the evening, in the night. The poor man got so much obsessed with it that when he came home he still walked the way Abraham Lincoln used to walk; he still talked in one hundred year-old language, and he still stuttered.

His wife, his children, his father and mother all laughed. They said, ”You have done enough – one year – now, drop it. And let your other leg also be lengthened so that you stop this business of walking like a lame man. And there is no need to stutter.”

But he said, ”I am Abraham Lincoln.”

First they thought he was joking, but soon they realized it was not a joke. He had started believing that he was Abraham Lincoln. They tried in every possible way... but once he had seen the glory of being the President of America and one of the greatest men of history, he was not ready to descend down back to being an ordinary human being.

He was brought to the psychoanalyst, but to no effect; he would behave just like Abraham Lincoln. And he would ask the psychoanalyst, ”What is missing in me that you are so worried? What is the problem? Why am I not accepted as Abraham Lincoln? You show me any fault....” And it was true, there was no fault.

Finally the psychoanalyst said , ”This is beyond... this is not a case of mental derangement. He has become obsessed, and he will understand only when he has been assassinated. But then there will be no point. And if you assassinate him, perhaps he may think that he was right – even dying, he will die exactly like Abraham Lincoln. He has died many times on the stage, although the assassination was false. But he knew how to fall, what to say, what Abraham Lincoln’s last words were. Even if he is assassinated, he will do his act to the very last.”

You will think that this is a rare story, but the fact is, we are all living a personality which has been imposed on us.

So Let's drop our Abraham Linoln Masks immediately or else we will loose ourselves.

Enjoy other interesting Stories told by Osho HERE!

STOP Self Destruction

We (Human Beings) have a very great outlook of ourselves. We have appointed ourselves as the protectors of the Planet, the guardians of the animal kingdom, the saviors of Earth's vegetation, heck we have even declared that even God looks like us (I know, you would say, God created us in his image. But in reality it's us who imagined him in our image).

We have done everything to create a self image of ourselves which almost equals God, but in reality what is the situation.

I have read in an article that, as per scientific studies if all the insects in the planet disappears tomorrow, the living beings in the planet will have only 25 years of life left. All life in the planet, animals, plants, trees, including bacteria and also us the great Human Beings will dies within 25 years of the disappearance of the insects.

Now what will happen if all the Human Beings disappear tomorrow from this planet? 

Well, there will be one big party and the whole animal kingdom, plants, insects and even bacteria will rejoice and our planet will have great sense of relief. There will be no-one affected by our disappearance, in fact life will thrive and Earth will breath easy.

So who is more important, who is the protector of this planet and who is near God?

Human Beings or Insects

I think we should put ourselves in the right place and not over estimate our role on this planet. We might have Romanticized the idea of we being the protectors of Earth, but in realty we are protecting ourselves from our own stupidity. We ourselves are destroying the life on Earth with our stupidity and in-sensitiveness and now we are trying frantically to undo the damage.

There is nothing wrong in all the great effort that people are taking to stop the self destruction, but the way this effort is being projected has not helped. The captions like "Save Earth" "Protect the Planet" doesn't project the reality. These attitudes has helped in differentiating ourselves from the actual source of the problem. We think that we are doing great things to protect the planet and the actual source of the problem is somewhere else. We think we are the solution, but the fact is that we ourselves are the problem.

I think the captions which will convey the situation with clarity are :

"Stop Suicide"

"Stop Killing Your Children"

"Stop Self Destruction"

May be these statement convey the reality more clearly. I believe the change in the outlook of our approach will sensitize our self with nature, with the life on this planet and will make us look at the situation in a more inclusive manner, than in an indifferent way.

JKS

Do People Hate You? Fantastic!

A wonderful story told by Osho.

A Sufi Master wrote a small book which was outrageous in many ways to the traditional, orthodox mind. And then he told one of his disciples, ”Go to the IMAM, the greatest priest, and give this book to him as a present from me. And watch, watch carefully what happens. And come and report to me EXACTLY what happens, without any interpretation of your own.”

This was a device, a double-edged sword. It was a device for the disciple to see whether he could report exactly what happened without changing it, coloring it, interpreting it. His commentary was not needed; he had to just be absolutely factual, a pure, detached observer, as if he was not concerned at all.

He went there very alert, he knew that this was a kind of test. He presented the imam the book; he was sitting in the garden. It was a winter morning and he was enjoying the sun. His wife was sitting there.

When he presented the book, the imam asked, ”Who has written this?” 

He told his Master’s name. The imam suddenly became so enraged that he threw the book outside the gate and said, ”This type of nonsense, this type of outrageous, irreligious, sacrilegious thing cannot enter into my house! Get out immediately and never come here again! Your Master is a danger to the society. He is creating chaos, he is destroying our religion!” 

For a moment the disciple was losing his detachment, because great anger was arising in him, but he remembered that the Master had said that he had to be just a reporter; he had not to bring his emotions in, his sentiments in. 

Just when he was leaving, the wife of the imam said, ”You could have thrown it out a little later on when the man had gone. There was no need to be so enraged – it doesn't fit you, your status. Or, you have such a big library in which there are all kinds of books – you could have put that book there also. If you don’t want to read it there is no need to read it. And I have seen all kinds of books – religious, irreligious, belonging to our religion, belonging to other religions – in your library, so why can’t this book also be a part of the library?”

Again the disciple felt an emotion arising, that the woman was more compassionate, more loving, more human. But suddenly he became aware that he had not to bring his attitude into it at all; he had just to report. He came back and he just reported, but when he was reporting, at the last moment he forgot and he said, ”One thing I must say, that the imam’s wife is a very nice, beautiful woman, and she even seems to understand you. Maybe one day she can be converted to your path.”

The Master said, ”Wait! Who has asked about your commentary, about your interpretation? You should simply report. And as far as your commentary is concerned, it is absolutely wrong. If you ask me, then I will say this imam is sooner or later going to be trapped by me, but his wife will never be a part of our commune, NEVER, because his wife is indifferent. She says, ’YOU can put it in the library.’ The imam HATES me – hate can be transformed into love – but the wife is just indifferent: she does not love me, she does not hate me. She is not interested in me at all. She says, ’There is no need to throw it out.’ But the way the imam became enraged shows his emotion; soon he will feel that it was not right. And I tell you: go again and see what has happened to the book – the imam must have taken it back into his home, he must be reading it now. A man who becomes so enraged is already interested. He cannot avoid reading it – he HAS to read it.”

And the disciple went again. And wonder of wonders! The Master was right: the imam was reading the book....

Enjoy other interesting Stories told by Osho HERE!

Why Should I Talk?

Almost all the people I know keep complaining to me that I talk very less. The queries keep pouring from all corners, Why don't you talk? How can you not talk for so long? Why don't you say something? and the list goes on.

I wonder what all the fuss is all about. I believe people don't talk for two reasons.

The first being they have a lot to say, they want to talk but don't know how to say it and are afraid of expressing whats inside them. The other being that there is not much inside to come out and there is no genuine reason to talk.  

I belong to the second category. I don't understand why I should talk just for the heck of it. If I have something to say I will definitely say it, but just muttering out something just because my mouth is free doesn't make sense.

When we are together my wife keeps telling me say something, don't be silent. I feel as if two people who know each other just cannot sit together and be silent. When they are silent it feels as if there is an undercurrent of tension between the two and the tension can be broken only by talking to each other. I feel this tension forces us to say something or the other in that situation.

I just wonder is speech the only way to communicate with the people we know. In case of strangers it's understandable that we need to talk to build a relationship, but what about the people whom we know intimately. Even with the people whom we share every thing in life, do we have to talk to express. Can't we just sit together hold hands and just enjoy each other company? Why do we feel uncomfortable when we are together and we don't talk?

One more thing that baffles me is that when two people talk, what I notice is that both are interested in saying something and nobody is interested in listening to what the other person says. It's like when one person talks the other person is preparing himself to say what he wants to say, rather than listen to what the other person is saying. It's not Talk & Listen routine that goes on but Talk & Talk keeps happening. So the end result is that both the persons have talked without listening to one another. I wonder what the heck did they talk? Was it a dialogue between two people or just each person doing his own monologue.

If this is the case that happens most of the time, then whats the point of replying to the other person. I can just keep quite and the other person will say what he wants to say in-spite of me saying anything. So I believe it's just better to keep quite, let the other person finish his speech and move on. There is no point replying him, since he will not listen to me anyway.

So the summary is :

People like to say something

They expect you to listen to them

They expect you to reply back

But they will not listen to your reply and

They will get angry if you don't reply or talk and

They will say YOU DON'T TALK.

Does it make any sense?

For more interesting articles on Human behavior check out my other posts at Confessions of a Family Man blog

This Too Will Pass Away!

The most brilliant story old by Osho.

A king was getting old and of course, worried and concerned about death. One day, he could not sleep the whole night long; he was continuously thinking of death. He has killed thousands of people himself; he has been a great conqueror – what has happened to him? Why has he become so cowardly? The death of the other does not matter to you, but your own death matters.

In the morning, he called his wise men and asked them: ”If I fall into a situation where you are not available to advise me and I don’t see any way out, I would like you to make a small suggestion that I can put under the big diamond in my ring.” The ring was made with an opening device, so he could look underneath the diamond and read the message.

They were at a loss. This was something very difficult – just one sentence, for millions of situations. How can there be one answer for all the questions? Only a man like me can say, ”Yes, not only that – there is only one answer for all questions; there cannot be even two.”

They were worried and puzzled, but one old man suggested something and that appealed to them, so they brought it to the king. He was not to see it – the condition was that he was not to see it. He was not to open it just out of curiosity. He was to open it in a real danger, when there is no other possibility for him, when he cannot figure it out, when he’s simply stuck and knows nothing about what to do. Only in such emergencies, when life is at stake should he open the ring and read the message.

And by chance, the time to read it came very soon, just after fifteen days. The neighboring country invaded. They had been invaded by this king many times, defeated many times. They were boiling with anger and violence and humiliation and insult. For ten years, they had been training their people and this time they were determined: ”Either we take over the kingdom of the enemy or we are not going to come back home alive.”

And when somebody, even if he is beaten, has such an idea in the mind, he’s no longer weak. He is far stronger than your strongest people.

They fought as the king had never seen anybody fight... because the king and his soldiers were just fighting to defend, but the enemy was fighting to gain self-respect. They had lost their integrity, and even at the cost of life it had to be regained – even if the whole country dies!

The king lost the war. Somehow he escaped to the mountains on his horse, but the enemies were following. He was alone and he could hear many troops of horses following him and the noise was coming closer and closer. He was running as fast as the poor horse could run, because he was wounded, almost at the point of death. But the greatest difficulty came when they reached the end of the road – that road was not going anywhere! It only came to this spot where tourists used to come. It was a very scenic situation, but it was death to the king – he could not go anywhere.

Underneath, there was a rocky valley thousands of feet deep. If he jumped into it, he would be finished. And he could not return because it was a small road....

Then he suddenly saw the diamond shining in the sun, and remembered, opened the diamond, read the message. The message was very small but very great. The message was: ”This too will pass away.”

Just let the idea sink in your heart: This too will pass away. So there is no need to be worried. In life, there is nothing permanent.

Everything is changing. You could not have thought, fifteen days before, that you would be in this situation. You cannot think what your situation will be after fifteen days. Don’t be worried: This too will pass. Everything passes by.

It had a great effect on the man. He relaxed, he forget all about those people following him. He said, ”I have never come to this spot. It is perhaps one of the most beautiful spots around the capital and I might have missed it if I had not been defeated by the enemy. This beauty is worth losing the whole kingdom for.” He enjoyed the beauty... and after a few minutes he became aware that the noise of the horses and the enemy coming was receding: ”Perhaps they have moved into some other part of the mountains, but certainly they are not on this footpath.”

He gathered his armies, he fought again. He won his kingdom back, and when he was received at the elephant gate of the capital, the whole capital was just festivity. Everybody was rejoicing the victory. Flowers were being thrown on the king from every house, from every place. People were dancing, singing, playing on their instruments. And for a moment the king said, just inside himself, ”It is not so easy to defeat me.” And he saw a subtle ego arising with all this reception and celebration.

Again, the big diamond was shining in the light and he remembered it. He opened it. He read it again: ”This too will pass.” He became silent. His face went through a total change – from the egoist he moved to a state of utter humbleness.

If this too is going to pass, it is not yours.

The defeat was not yours, the victory is not yours.

The death was not yours, the life is not yours.

You are just a watcher. Everything passes by.

Enjoy other interesting Stories told by Osho HERE!

How to Defeat FEAR?

If we list out all the things that people are afraid of, then that list will have all things that exist on this Earth and even beyond. The question of what we afraid of is simply stupid, it would more useful if we ask our self why do get afraid of things?

So let's ponder on what exactly this Fear is. If we list out the characteristics of fear it will be like this.

1. Fear enters us when we don't know what is going to happen
2. Fear enters us when we want something very desperately
3. Fear is always about the future
4. Fear is always about the unknown

If we try and understand our Fears a bit, it will be clear that when we don't know what is going to happen, when we try and get something which we dearly want and we start thinking about the future which is going to happen then fear will surely enter us. We are not really afraid of our past, we are only afraid of our past resulting something bad in our future. It is always our obsession with determining our future that results in Fear.

If we can walk in a dark alley just enjoying the darkness and not thinking what is going come out in front of us the next second, there is no way we will be afraid of darkness. It is not the darkness which makes us afraid, it is our expectation and anticipation of what is going to come out of it, that causes us to be afraid.

The more desperate we are to get something, the more is the chances of we getting afraid of loosing it. We start anticipating our loss even before we try and in-turn invite fear into us. So if we can take our life as a game and enjoy the play and not worry about the result most of the fear inside us will disappear.

So what to we need to do, to defeat fear?

Very simple, Just relax, enjoy every thing, every activity, every emotion, every hardship and every success in  life every moment and just forget about the future. The future will take care of itself.

JKS

Just Remembering is Enough

A Spiritual Story told by Osho:

I have heard that a king expelled his son from his kingdom. He was angry with his son, a spoiled son, and so in a moment of rage he threw him out. The son did not have any skills or vocation. What can a king’s son know? He was not even educated, so he could do nothing to make a decent living. How ever he had, by way of a hobby, learned a little singing and dancing in his childhood. So he took to singing and dancing on the streets of a town belonging to a hot and arid neighboring country where he found refuge.

For ten years the king’s son lived the life of a homeless beggar in tattered and dirty clothes. So he completely forgot that he was ever a prince. And curiously enough, in these ten years, he was increasingly maturing towards kingship, since he was the only son of a king who was growing older and older. But, at present, he was a faceless person moving from door to door with a begging bowl in his hands.

When the king became very old he grew worried about the future of his throne. Who was going to succeed him and manage his kingdom after his death? So he asked his prime minister to search for his only son, whom he had expelled years ago, and bring him back so he could take over the reins of his kingdom from him. Even if he was stupid he had to be recalled, the king thought. There was no other alternative.

The prime minister went out in search of his king’s son. After a great deal of inquiry and effort he reached the town where his future master was living as a nobody. His chariot halted in front of a hotel, where he found him under a scorching midday sun, a young man begging a little money from the hotel manager to buy himself a pair of sandals. He was pointing to his bare and bleeding feet, lacerated with wounds. The prime minister stepped down from the chariot and approached the young beggar. He took no time to recognize him – he was the king’s son – although he was in rags, his body emaciated, his face shriveled and sunburned. He bowed to him and said, ”The king has pardoned you and asks you to return to your kingdom.”

In a second, a split-second, the young man’s face was transformed and he threw away his beggar’s bowl. In no time at all he ceased to be a beggar and became a king. And he told the prime minister, ”Go to the market and bring me a pair of good shoes and good clothes, and in the meantime make arrangements for my bath.” And with the stride of a prince he walked to the chariot and stepped aboard.

In and around the hotel, everybody, who a little while ago had given him alms or denied them, came rushing, crowding around his chariot. And they found he was a different man altogether, he was not even looking at them now. They asked him, ”How is it you forget us in a moment?” The prince said, ”I remembered you as long as I had forgotten who I was. Just now I have remembered who I am, so forget I am a beggar. ” When the crowd reminded him of what he had been only a moment ago, he said, ”Now I remember. Now I know I am a king. I have always been a king.”

Enjoy other interesting Stories told by Osho HERE!

How to Control Anger?

Anger! An emotion everyone experiences very often and are afraid of. The fear is not about anger itself but what we do when it envelopes us. It's like a storm which consumes us and makes us do things which we would not have done under normal circumstances. It makes us loose control on ourselves, we loose the sense of discretion and logical thinking, and finally it leaves a lot of damage behind which makes us regret our actions and carry the regret for rest of our lives.

Now to tackle this beast we need to understand it better. I am jotting down my understanding of Anger, lets see if it makes things clear about Anger.

1. Anger is a form of energy which wants to come out of our system

Like Joy, Happiness, Sorrow and Fear, Anger is an emotional energy which wants to be released and expressed by our system. Some people express it by throwing things and some by withdrawing themselves from the situation. When we are not able to express our energies in a positive and constructive manner, it can result in anger. Which is basically a forceful expression of our energies.

2. Anger depends upon our Internal State of Being, than the external situations

The reasons for getting angry are many and it's simply useless to list them. We can get angry on or because of anything or anybody. For example while driving if some one overtakes us rashly we can get angry and go after him and if the same thing happens when you are in a happy mood, you may just ignore that person. So the happenings because of which we get angry are only triggers, what is more important is in what state we are in at the moment. We have to understand that Anger is dependent on the state in which our mind, body and emotions are and not on external situations. If we can maintain out internal situation in a state of balance and calm, no external situation can cause anger to be generated in us. (Internal situation can be maintained better by understanding the Characteristics of Mind.)

3. Physical effects of Anger

Anger is like a disease which can be monitored by watching out for the symptoms. There are many symptoms for Anger:
Change in breathing pattern, heavy breathing, increase in body temperature, increased thought flow, loss of logical thinking, loss of discretionary thinking, increased hormonal (adrenalin) flow in the stomach and other part of the body etc.,
If we can observe these symptoms we can maintain a distance from anger and control it better.

4. Anger happens when our desires are not fulfilled

The basic trigger of anger are when our desires are not met. All the triggers of anger are just that, our unfulfilled desires, whether it's a desire to cruse smoothly on road, or have a quite undisturbed dinner with a loved one. When someone or something causes these desires to be unfulfilled it triggers the already bubbling volcano of anger inside and it results in we exploding in anger. (you can check out my article on What is a Desire for more information on desire)

If we can understand these characteristics of anger we will be in a better situation to handle it when it comes out and we can also take steps to prevent it from building up to the breaking point in the first place.

The various steps we can take to prevent anger building up and to control it when it comes out are:

1. Delay taking any action when we are angry. It's best sit through the storm of anger than do anything to express it.
2. Watch the show, Don't stop it. The trick is to just let things happen and watch the show. If your breathing is going up - Watch it, if you are getting hot - Watch it, If you are getting a strong urge to throw things around -  Watch it. Keep watching and slowly the anger will loose steam and come to a halt. If we try to stop it, the energy will go back inside the system and will wait for next opportunity to come out.
3.Yoga and Mediation will help in channeling the energy in the system in a proper and will help in preventing the energy build up which will lead to anger bursts. It will help in maintaining our internal situation in a balanced and peaceful state.
4.Physical exercise can help in dissipating the excess energy and can help in preventing anger.

Basically it's about understanding the functioning of anger by watching ourselves intensely in angry situations and keeping ourselves calm and peaceful.

Well my journey of self discovery continues and I will keep updating on other techniques to tackle the beast of anger, till then Stay Calm, Happy and Watch the Beast.

JKS

Now Just Sit!

A beutiful Story told by Osho:

A woodcutter used to go into the woods every day. Sometimes he had to remain hungry because it was raining; sometimes it was too hot, sometimes it was too cold.

A mystic lived in the woods. He watched the woodcutter growing old, sick, hungry, working hard the whole day. He said, ”Listen, why don’t you go a little further?”

The woodcutter said ”What am I going to get a little further? More wood? Unnecessarily carrying that wood for miles?” 

The mystic said, ”No. If you go a little further, you will find a copper mine. You can take the copper into the city, and that will be enough for seven days. You need not come every day to cut the wood.”

The man thought, ”Why not give it a try?”

He went in and found the mine. And he was so happy... he came back and fell at the feet of the mystic.

The mystic said, ”Don’t rejoice too much right now. You have to go a little deeper into the woods.”

”But,” he said, ”what is the point? Now I have got seven days’ food.”

The mystic said, ”Still....”

But the man said, ”I will lose the copper mine if I go further.”

He said, ”You go. You certainly will lose the copper mine, but there is a silver mine. And whatsoever you can bring will be enough for three months.”

”The mystic has proved right about the copper mine,” the woodcutter thought. ”Perhaps he is also right about the silver mine.” And he went in and found the silver mine.

And he came dancing, and he said, ”How can I pay you? My gratitude knows no bounds.”

The mystic said, ”Don’t be in a hurry. Go a little deeper.”

He said, ”No! I cannot. I will lose the silver mine.”

The mystic said, ”But there is a gold mine just few steps deeper.”

The woodcutter was hesitant. In fact, he was such a poor man, that having a silver mine – he had never dreamed of it.

But if the mystic is saying it, who knows? – he may still be right. And he found the gold mine. Now it was enough to come once a year.

But the mystic said, ”It will be a long time – one year from now you will be coming here. I am getting old – I may not be here, I may be gone. So I have to tell you, don’t stop at the gold mine. Just a little more....”

But the man said, ”Why? What is the point? You show me one thing, and the moment I get it, you immediately tell me to drop that and go ahead! Now I have found the gold mine!”

The mystic said, ”But there is a diamond mine just a few feet deeper in the forest.”

The woodcutter went that very day, and he found it. He brought many diamonds, and he said, ”This will be enough for my whole life.”

The mystic said, ”Now perhaps we may not meet again, so my last message is: now that you have enough for your whole life, go in! Forget the forest, the copper mine, the silver mine, the gold mine, the diamond mine. Now I give you the ultimate secret, the ultimate treasure that is within you. Your outer needs are fulfilled. Sit the way I am sitting here.”

The poor man said, ”Yes, I was wondering... you know all these things – why do you go on sitting here? The question has arisen again and again. And I was just going to ask, ‘Why don’t you get all those diamonds lying there? Only you know about them. All that gold! Why do you go on sitting under this tree?’”

The mystic said, ”After finding the diamonds, my master told me, ‘Now sit under this tree and go in.’”

The man dropped all the diamonds there, and he said, ”Perhaps we may not meet again. I don’t want to go home – I am going to sit here by your side. Please teach me how to go in, because I am a woodcutter. I know how to go deeper into the woods, but I don’t know how to go in.”

The mystic said, ”But all your diamonds, gold, copper, silver – all that will be lost, because all these things are valueless for one who goes in.”

The woodcutter said, ”Don’t be bothered about that. You have been right up to now. I trust you, that you will be right in this last stage too.”

Enjoy other interesting Stories told by Osho HERE!

Why do People Change after Marriage?

I always tend to here this from Husbands and Wives "You have changed so much after marriage" or "you are not same person whom I met before marriage". Well most of the times the statements are true and I keep wondering what is that about marriage which forces people to change.

So let's start by listing out the major changes that marriage brings in the lives of the couple and may be this information can lead to the causes for people transforming after marriage.

1. Sharing of living space

2. Sharing of money earned

3. Sharing of ambitions in life

4. Sharing of each other extended families

So basically what happens is instead having your own living space, money, goals and families, we have share all these with our partners after marriage.

But does sharing all these things really cause so much change in peoples behavior?

Do we really share everything with our spouse or we just give them access into our life with a lot of conditions attached?

Are we really and completely open minded that we allow our partners an unrestricted and no holds barred access to our life?

The answer is we are not.

In the Honeymoon period we are eager and excited to share each others space, love and opinions with an open mind. We tend to share all the good looking, sweet smelling aspects of ourselves initially with much enthusiasm, but as when the reserves of these sweet things gets exhausted we become confused. We start looking for more good stuff in our closet and after some time there will be nothing new to share. As time roles on all the things that where wonderful, sweet, cute and sexy in our partner tends to be taken for granted. It becomes a every day routine, it looses it's freshness and our partner looses their mystic.

With marriage there is no more need to impress each other as there is no more uncertainty and insecurity in the relationship. So we tend to take each other for granted and from this point on the game reaches the next stage.

Till now we have experienced the best the other person can offer, now it's time to make them give us what we want. When the relationship is new we accept our partners exactly as they were but when we start taking them for granted we expect them to be the way we want them to be. So we try to impose our image of a perfect wife/husband on our partners. We ask each other to dress in certain way, to talk in a certain way, to behave in a manner which we thing is appropriate. Whatever we thought was sexy in our partner before marriage tends to become boring and inappropriate, whatever we thought was adventurous behavior becomes silly and childish. Slowly we start to impose ourselves on each other and start changing each other into objects which fulfill over desires and fantasies.

Over time Husband and Wife looses their individuality and turn each other to mere objects. Wife becomes an object to fulfill husband's need of sex, she becomes a nanny, a babysitter, a caretaker and also a source of good income, she very rarely is treated as a beloved, a friend or as a lover. The is true for the husband also.

The two individuals who loved each other and decided to share each others lives, turn each other into mere objects. One day when we just pause and look, we realize that the person with whom I lived for so many years is not the same person whom I married. Then we ask him/her

"You have changed so much after marriage, you are not same person whom I met before marriage".

So why did our partner changed so much after marriage, because we wanted and forced them to.

JKS

Life keeps Changing, Don't Get Stuck in the Past

There is a famous story as told by Osho:

There were two temples in Japan, both enemies to each other, as temples have always been down the ages. The priests were so antagonistic that they had stopped even looking at each other. If they came across each other on the road, they would not look at each other. If they came across each other on the road they stopped talking; for centuries those two temples and their priests had not talked.

But both the priests had two small boys -- to serve them, just for running errands. Both the priests were afraid that boys, after all, will be boys, and they might start becoming friends to each other.

The one priest said to his boy, "Remember, the other temple is our enemy. Never talk to the boy of the other temple! They are dangerous people -- avoid them as one avoids a disease, as one avoids the plague. Avoid them!" The boy was always interested, because he used to get tired of listening to great sermons -- he could not understand them. Strange scriptures were read, he could not understand the language. Great, ultimate problems were discussed. There was nobody to play with, nobody even to talk with. And when he was told, "Don't talk to the boy of the other temple," great temptation arose in him. That's how temptation arises.

That day he could not avoid talking to the other boy. When he saw him on the road he asked him, "Where are you going?"

The other boy was a little philosophical; listening to great philosophy he had become philosophical. He said, "Going? There is nobody who comes and goes! It is happening -- wherever the wind takes me...." He had heard the master say many times that that's how a buddha lives, like a dead leaf: wherever the wind takes it, it goes. So the boy said, "I am not! There is no doer. So how can I go? What nonsense are you talking? I am a dead leaf. Wherever the wind takes me...."

The other boy was struck dumb. He could not even answer. He could not find anything to say. He was really embarrassed, ashamed, and felt also, "My master was right not to talk with these people -- these are dangerous people! What kind of talk is this? I had asked a simple question: 'Where are you going?' In fact I already knew where he was going, because we were both going to purchase vegetables in the market. A simple answer would have done."

He went back, told his master, "I am sorry, excuse me. You HAD prohibited me, I didn't listen to you. In fact, because of your prohibition I was tempted. This is the first time I have talked to those dangerous people. I just asked a simple question. 'Where are you going?' and he started saying strange things: 'There is no going, no coming. Who comes? Who goes? I am utter emptiness,' he was saying, 'just a dead leaf in the wind. And wherever the wind takes me....'"

The master said, "I told you before! Now, tomorrow stand in the same place and when he comes ask him again, 'Where are you going?' And when he says these things, you simply say, 'That's true. Yes, you are a dead leaf, so am I. But when the wind is not blowing, where are you going? Then where can you go?' Just say that, and that will embarrass him -- and he has to be embarrassed, he has to be defeated. We have been constantly quarreling, and those people have not been able to defeat us in any debate. So tomorrow it has to be done!"

Early the boy got up, prepared his answer, repeated it many times before he went. Then he stood in the place where the boy used to cross the road, repeated again and again, prepared himself, and then he saw the boy coming. He said, "Okay, now!"

The boy came. He asked, "Where are you going?" And he was hoping that now the opportunity would come....

But the boy said, "Wherever the legs will take me...." No mention of wind! No talk of nothingness! No question of the non doer! Now what to do? His whole ready-made answer looked absurd. Now to talk about the wind would be irrelevant.

Again crestfallen, now REALLY ashamed that he was simply stupid: "And this boy certainly knows some strange things -- now he says, 'Wherever the legs take me....'"

He went back to the master. The master said, "I have told you NOT to talk with those people -- they are dangerous! This is our centuries-long experience. But now something has to be done. So tomorrow you ask again, 'Where are you going?' and when he says, 'Wherever my legs take me,' tell him, 'If you had no legs, then...?' He has to be silenced one way or other!"

So the next day he asked again, "Where are you going?" and waited.

And the boy said, "I am going to the market to fetch vegetables."

Man ordinarily functions out of the past, and life goes on changing. Life has no obligation to fit with your conclusions. That's why life is very confusing -- confusing to the knowledgeable person. He has all ready-made answers: The Bhagavadgita, the holy Koran, the Bible, the Vedas. He has everything crammed, he knows all the answers. But life never raises the same question again; hence the knowledgeable person always falls short.

Enjoy other interesting Stories told by Osho HERE!